Positive Psychology’s Lessons for Coping with Stress | Dr. Samantha Boardman on Modern Wisdom with Chris Williamson

Check out the Modern Wisdom podcast page

Key Takeaways

  • “We are so good at noticing what is left undone but not particularly good at remembering what we accomplished” – Dr. Samantha Boardman
    • ACTIVITY: Think about the last thing you didn’t complete and how long it stuck in your mind. Then think about the last thing you did complete and how long that stuck in your mind.
      • Incompletion often evokes shame or guilt rather than encouragement, which tends to have a lingering impact
      • Completion is often passed off as relief rather than achievement, which lets the impact slip away quickly
  • Humans are fairly resilient to large life stresses (death of family member) but can experience negative rumination as micro-stresses continually pile up
  • Stress is a personal perception, your response can help you build resilience or defeat your confidence
    • “Discomfort is data” Dr. Samantha Boardman
    • Stress can be utilized as a tool or interpreted as a weapon
    • Reframe your mind around stress: when you’re at the gym, remember that you came there to feel the pain. When you are challenged by a textbook question, remember that is the reason why you came to university.
    • Be Un-You: self distance yourself from your natural reaction to stress, think about what your future self would say about your response
  • Positive Psychologyuse your positive attributes constantly and in different ways to counter-balance negative stress
    • If you consider yourself to be generous, find ways to create different and more plentiful opportunities for yourself to be generous

Intro

Anxiety & the Psychology of Yourself

  • Anxiety: At the beginning of the Covid-19 pandemic, Dr. Boardman was worried about her patients suffering from anxiety
    • Believe it or not, these patients actually emerged as advise practitioners to those suffering anxiety for the first time as a result of the pandemic
    • Lock Down Shame – Many people are disappointed with themselves for not achieving fitness or educational goals during lockdown
      • “What would have had to happen in lockdown for you to look back on it and consider it a success?” – Chris Williamson
    • “We are so good at noticing what is left undone but not particularly good at remembering what we accomplished” – Dr. Samantha Boardman
    • Delight hunting: cognitive recognition of positive emotions
  • ACTIVITY: Think about the last thing you didn’t complete and how long it stuck in your mind. Then think about the last thing you did complete and how long that stuck in your mind.
    • Incompletion often evokes shame or guilt rather than encouragement, which tends to have a lingering impact
    • Completion is often passed off as relief rather than achievement, which lets the impact slip away quickly
  • ‘I am who, I am’ makes you a prisoner to your own incorrect presumptions about yourself
    • This perspective derives from a fear of change – be open to being wrong about yourself
    • You can always teach a dog new tricks

Stress

  • Micro-stress is everyday small inconveniences that are usually out of your control
    • Ex: Traffic jams, coffee spills, etc
  • We are fairly resilient to large stresses (death, negative life events) but micro stresses lack the social support that large stresses tend to receive and will snowball into bigger compounding problems
    • Impacts your mental and physical health
    • More likely to develop anxiety or depression
    • Negative Rumination – excessive and intrusive thoughts about negative experiences and feelings that compound
  • Stress is a personal perception, your response can help you build resilience or defeat your confidence
    • “Discomfort is data” Dr. Samantha Boardman
    • Today, there is a large intolerance for negative emotions. They can be very valuable.
    • Reframe your mind around stress: when you’re at the gym, remember that you came there to feel the pain. When you are challenged by a textbook question, remember that is the reason why you came to university.
    • The point of therapy is to change your past – not to change the events but to change your perception of how you let the event affect your present emotions

Combatting Stress & Positive Psychology

  • We constantly undermine our well-being and do the exact opposite of what we should
    • Don’t eat the pizza, don’t drink the glass of wine, don’t binge-watch Netflix – don’t seek out an immediate sense of relief
    • Be Un-You: self distance yourself from your natural reaction to stress, think about what your future self would say about your response. Have cognitive flexibility to your true self.
  • Top healthy destressing activities:
    • Time outdoors: 94%, work on a hobby: 93%, exercise: 89%, time with a pet: 87%, meditate or pray: 85%, time with friends and family: 83%, full night sleep: 76%
    • Simply 20 minutes outside can be a mentally beneficial dose, especially when paired with something you want to do like reading more podcastnotes.org or walking the dog, or visiting with a friend
    • Make it easier for yourself to access and choose the healthy de-stressing option
  • Positive Psychologyuse your positive attributes constantly and in different ways to counter-balance negative stress
    • If you consider yourself to be generous, find ways to create different and more plentiful opportunities for yourself to be generous
    • Rebalance your zero emotional medium, fight negative stress with positive output
Modern Wisdom : , , ,
Notes By Drew Waterstreet

More Notes on these topics

Top Insights and Tactics From

31 Best Podcasts of All Time

FREE when you join over 12,000 subscribers to the
Podcast Notes newsletter

No Thanks