
November 3, 2020
13 Things Mentally Strong People Do When Their Candidate Loses | Amy Morin on The James Altucher Show
Check out The James Altucher Show Episode Page & Show Notes
Key Takeaways
- The #1 thing that people are talking to their therapists about is political stress:
- “They’re reaching out and getting help because they’re so stressed out about the election” – Amy Morin
- “Everyone wants you to vote as long as they’re voting on your side” – Amy Morin
- Whoever wins the election, about 80 million Americans will be disappointed with the outcome
- 13 Things Mentally Strong People Do When Their Candidate Loses:
- 1) They Accept The Outcome
- 2) They Name Their Feelings
- 3) They Look At The Facts
- 4) They Argue The Opposite When Thinking Of Doom And Gloom
- 5) They Limit Their Media
- 6) They Stop Commiserating
- 7) They Focus On What They Can Control
- 8) They Resist The Urge To Argue On Social Media
- 9) They Reach For Healthy Coping Skills
- 10) They Take Care Of Themselves
- 11) They Change The Channel In Their Brain
- 12) They Schedule Time To Worry
- 13) They Take Positive Action
- The size of your advance in the book industry is related to 2 things:
- How well your last book sold
- Your social media follower count
Intro
- Amy Morin (@AmyMorinLCSW) is a psychotherapist, mental strength trainer, and international bestselling author. She’s a highly sought after keynote speaker who gave one of the most popular TEDx talks of all time.
- Host: James Altucher (@jaltucher)
Books Mentioned
- Amy’s new book is directed towards kids and is called 13 Things Strong Kids Do
13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do
- Here are the 13 original tips from Amy’s book 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do:
- 1) They Don’t Waste Time Feeling Sorry for Themselves
- 2) They Don’t Give Away Their Power
- 3) They Don’t Shy Away from Change
- 4) They Don’t Waste Energy on Things They Can’t Control
- 5) They Don’t Worry About Pleasing Everyone
- 6) They Don’t Fear Taking Calculated Risks
- 7) They Don’t Dwell on the Past
- 8) They Don’t Make the Same Mistakes Over and Over
- 9) They Don’t Resent Other People’s Success
- 10) They Don’t Give Up After the First Failure
- 11) They Don’t Fear Alone Time
- 12) They Don’t Feel the World Owes Them Anything
- 13) They Don’t Expect Immediate Results
Talking About Presidential Elections
- The #1 thing that people are talking to their therapists about is political stress:
- “They’re reaching out and getting help because they’re so stressed out about the election” – Amy Morin
- James has never voted in a presidential election because he likes to say neutral as a writer, podcaster, and someone who has a large audience
- “I think you need to be respectfully neutral to do that” – James Altucher
- “Everyone wants you to vote as long as they’re voting on your side” – Amy Morin
- Whoever wins the election, about 80 million Americans will be disappointed with the outcome
- Whoever wins the 2020 election, keep in mind that the world will go on
- The US has survived, depressions, recessions, world wars, and more. We can survive an election.
- People think every election is the most important election ever. Here’s a quote from a newspaper James found talking about the 1892 election:
- “This is surely the most important election held in America”
- Here’s a quote from the 1940 election:
- “This is the most important election since 1860”
- Here’s a quote from the 1940 election:
- “This is surely the most important election held in America”
13 Things Mentally Strong People Do When Their Candidate Loses
- 1) They Accept The Outcome
- No matter who wins, a mentally strong person will accept the outcome and move on with their lives
- You can throw a pity party and wish things were different, but that’s a waste of time and doesn’t do you any good
- 2) They Name Their Feelings
- Many studies have shown that if you label your feelings, it takes the sting out of it:
- “Just putting a label to those emotions reduces the intensity of them, you start to feel better almost instantly” – Amy Morin
- Many studies have shown that if you label your feelings, it takes the sting out of it:
- 3) They Look At The Facts
- Take a step back to look at what’s true what’s not
- 4) They Argue The Opposite When Thinking Of Doom And Gloom
- If you think the economy will crash if your presidential candidate doesn’t win, argue the opposite
- Just because things will be different, it doesn’t mean things will be worse
- 5) They Limit Their Media
- No one, not even the media, knows exactly what the future holds
- Studies show that watching the evening news can elevate your stress levels
- Limit your media time to 30 minutes
- 6) They Stop Commiserating
- Commiserating, or complaining to others, makes you feel worse and makes the world seem more gloomy
- There’s a big difference between emotional support and commiserating
- “It’s not really all that healthy for us to just sit around and talk about how horrible life is” – Amy Morin
- 7) They Focus On What They Can Control
- You can’t control the outcome of the election but you can control your diet, who you spend time with, how much sleep you get, etc.
- The more we worry about things we can’t control, the more anxious we become
- 8) They Resist The Urge To Argue On Social Media
- People aren’t going to change who they’re going to vote for over a stranger’s opinion on social media
- “You’re not changing anyone’s opinion. You’re just wasting your time and your energy.” – Amy Morin
- 9) They Reach For Healthy Coping Skills
- Have a strategy to handle anxiety, fear, etc.
- Avoid reaching for alcohol or sweets
- Try doing yoga, spending time with loved ones, or other healthy ways of coping
- 10) They Take Care Of Themselves
- Get 8 hours of sleep, exercise daily, and eat healthily
- 11) They Change The Channel In Their Brain
- Recognize when you’re dwelling on the negative or ruminating on a problem instead of trying to solve it
- If you find yourself focusing on something negative, get up and go do something different (cleaning your room, go for a walk, call a friend to catch up, etc.)
- 12) They Schedule Time To Worry
- Give yourself 15 minutes to worry every day. With practice, people can contain their worrying to just 15 minutes a day.
- It’s okay to spend time worrying, the key, however, is to be able to contain it
- 13) They Take Positive Action
- Do something kind and positive for someone
- Be kind to your neighbor
- Send a thank you letter to a friend
- Do some community service
- Make your partner laugh
- Do something kind and positive for someone
Additional Notes
- It’s normal for people to have multiple sides of themselves
- You don’t talk to your grandmother the same way you talk to your college friends
- If you’re a content creator, you need to be on social media
- The size of your advance in the book industry is related to 2 things:
- How well your last book sold
- Your social media follower count